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Tuesday, September 14, 2010

My fiancé has a son who is 4 ½ years old and I’ve tried to build a relationship with him however, he’s a handful; hell lets just call a spade a spade he is “BAD”!! My fiancé has given me permission to discipline him, however, he doesn’t listen too anyone except his father, has a very, very bad attitude for his age and knows he can get away with murder by going to his dad. All this is starting to weigh thin on me, and I’m not sure how long I can continue with this relationship of 3 years due to the child. I have one girl 8 and one boy 5 and my children are not understanding his poor behavior at all…Please help ~~ Anonymous

How many have you walked into a relationship wondering that same question? Or another question I often hear is how to discipline someone's child other than your own without ruffling feathers of the other parent?? It's not an easy one for sure. You may have one parent that say's it's okay and the other parent may feel its not your place for whatever reason and leave it to the biological parent. NOTTTT a good idea at all I have to say, so take charge and take charge NOW!! Kids grow up...trust they will see who has authority as well as who doesn't. Sure as I'm typing they will take advantage of you not having that right, bet your bottom dollar on that one hands down. How many have you heard that cringing smart azz comment “you can't tell me what to do your not my mother/father”!! Okay I confess I wasn't one who heard it, but I sure enough used it....(yes I know bad me) ;-).

You have to be able to sit down and communicate with your significant other on whats the best way/option in disciplining the kid(s) and STICK with it, so the relationship isn't destroyed by unnecessary turmoil. If the kids see you both on 2 different pages...my, my, my, my, my, my (in my best Johnny Gill voice) let the games begin; kids starting out with 15 points to you all’s negative 55 points. If they see that you all have a solid foundation then they can't play one parent against the other and if there's another parent involved they see as well believe it or not and eventually come to terms to no harm no foul. Just whatever you all do: “NEVER let'em see you sweat”... your the adult(s) so gain or re-gain control of the upper hand. 


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  1. AnonymousSeptember 14, 2010 at 8:57 AM

    wow is all i can really say what you are gone have to do really is sit down with the father of this child and tell him that he cant allow him to get away with what you say he cant cause if he allows him todo the oppsit of what yo usay then whats the point of him allowin you to disipline him when he gone go against what you say thats why the child dont listen to you and if it was me wouldnt no 4year old child give me attitude or disrespect me for nothing cause imma make sure he get it right the first time adn yeah you tell that daddy stop playin favorites even though your kisd are not his your kids get in trouble when they do wrong then that 4 year old need to be punished as well

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